( Friends it;s a good article...... please go through it....)

  ( Friends it;s a good article...... please go through it....)

                 

        DON'T BLAME OTHERS FOR YOUR OWN FAILURE

  We live in a world where we make our own choices that decide our future but it doesn't not always turn out the way we anticipate it. Did we do something wrong or was it someone else who prevented that dream or goal of being achieved? The fact remains we have two choices to choose from when deciding who is to blame for something not going right, ourselves or someone else. Let's explore each of those choices.

Let's begin with blaming others. Some people find a feeling of closure when someone is given the blame for anything that goes wrong. It seems like the simple choice to make and we do not have to feel bad about ourselves either. We may rely on others to help us through difficult times but their advice can cause more harm than good. It's only fitting that the person who gave the bad advice should be held responsible. You can feel better about yourself seeing as you were not the cause of the misfortune so you are ready to move on.

Once we place the blame on someone else do we care how that person feels? Should that person feel bad for what they did even though they did it in good faith? But why would someone give us advice that only makes a situation worse? We don't like to point the finger at anyone but why take the blame for something you did based not the advice of others? A true friend would never put you in a bad situation but when they do it creates animosity towards the friendship and doubt as to whether the friendship is real or not. It just doesn't seem right.

It seems like I am justifying the fact that placing the blame on someone is OK. In fact, I am trying to prove a point that too often we look for someone else to blame rather than ourselves. Don't get me wrong in some instances (i.e. cheating, lying, backstabbing, etc) there are legitimate reasons to place the blame on someone but those are deliberate methods that have intent. To place the blame on someone else because we are too selfish or arrogant to hold ourselves accountable seems to be the preferred method by many.

As humans we tend to fear the word failure so to avoid succumbing to the negative aspects of it we blame someone else. It's the easy way out and those who have the ability to blame someone else and feel good about it are likely to be somewhat sociopath. That seems a bit harsh but it has some truth to it. People do not like to blame themselves or hold themselves accountable in some situations. Do we know why people do this?

I can't speak for everyone else but we need to be held more accountable for our actions. People who were born in the 1980's were taught what respect is and if you chose to be disrespectful you were likely to find yourself getting slapped, spanked, grounded or even your mouth washed out with soap. It was unheard of where a parent sat back and let their child blame others for their actions. Each child was held accountable and swiftly punished. Now don't get me started on today's generation because that is another whole theory on its own.

I might sound repetitive but the fact remains we have the ability to make our own decisions. We can choose what advice to take and which not to. No one is holding a gun to our heads and telling us that is how we will do it. If we choose to take some one's advice it's because we chose to not because we had to. We must hold ourselves accountable for our own actions rather than placing the blame on someone else. When we blame others we are running from our own fears or problems. Guess what? You have only yourself to blame because you chose to do it that way, you made your own decision, you chose not to change, and in the end it's all on you.

STOP playing the blame game because unless you are a marionette and everyone around you is pulling your strings and doing the talking for you, the choices you make are your decisions not theirs. That mentality is a tough one to swallow for some and if they choose not to make changes and hold themselves accountable then they will find themselves repeating problem after problem. They may seek sympathy after and we will give it to them but we are only enabling them. They need to be held accountable and they need to recognize they have only themselves to blame. It's a hard lesson to learn but it's the only way they will learn.