I AM SORRY

                            

Every time I see the pain in your eyes
A little part of my heart dies
No matter how hard and how often you try
all I seem to do is make you cry.

You risk so much and take such chance
To share your heart and your romance
You share your hopes and dreams and fears
And let me in to all that's dear

All I seem to do is be mean and cold
To fail to cherish, fail to hold
I seem to fail to put you first
You act your best, I am my worst

My mouth contradicts my heart
My actions and thoughts so far apart
I love you with every part of me
Yet act so cruel and thoughtlessly

I dream of you all night and day
And hang on every word you say
Yet all you see is selfishness and arrogance
Casual disdain and ignorance

Assumption and judgment and every thing's a test
No matter what you do you're always second best
No matter how hard you try it's never enough
I never hear your protestations of love

I say I love you and cherish all of our dreams
Yet act as if I can't hear your screams
Of need and want and stability and trust
My plans never materialize, my promises rust

I scream at myself at how stupid I am
For risking your love, for risking your hand
And I pray every day that you never see
That I need you more than you need me

I bare my heart and my soul to you
To say sorry for what I did and for what I do
I have no excuses and hide no more
All I can offer is my love for evermore.